I’ve been a movie extra a few times. I’m part of a casting agency that sends out casting calls for extras. I get about 5 or more e-mails a day from them. They need people to fill particular roles. It’s simple – if you think you fit, you submit yourself, they call you, you work for 15 hours and make $90. Sometimes I like a role so I submit. Sometimes they don’t really fit. Here are a few:

(Formatting note: there’s basic information that is always covered in each call; the show, the age, race and sex of the actor, the actual role, and if it’s a union job or not. Italics are my thoughts. Random note: I might never work in this town again for publishing this list of secrets)

————————————————-

• GOSSIP GIRL: NON SAG TO PORTRAY FOOD VENDOR AGE 20′S TO 30′S WITH REAL WAFFLE MAKING EXPERIENCE 8/18

1) You just put batter in a machine!  2) I have real waffle eating experience. That work?  3) Does this mean that a fresh waffle will be made on every take?

• MERCY: NON AFTRA MEN AVAIL 4/5 ALL DAY NO CONFLICT THAT CAN PORTRAY ASIAN MEN IN THEIR 30′S & 40′S – Extra Male / 30 to 40 / All Ethnicities

All ethnicities! “Must be comfortable making squinty eyes by pulling at the sides of your eyes with your fingers”

• LAW & ORDER CI: SAG – MALES 25-45 TO PORTRAY DEAD BODIES. FLEX BET 4/21-4/29. MUST BE COMFORTABLE BEING SHIRTLESS ON A SLAB. UPPER BODY SHOULD BE BLEMISH FREE. ALSO MUST BE OK WITH MAKEUP/LATEX – WILL HAVE TOOL MARK/INDENTS ON FACE. MUST BE PAID UP SAG. PLEASE DO NOT CALL US!

Shirtless – I’m ok with that. Slab! f-that! Please note that playing a corpse is a UNION JOB!

• MERCY: DO NOT RESPOND IF YOU ARE NOT A GREAT SOFTBALL PITCHER!

I shouldn’t have changed all the spelling errors in these posts. This agency really doesn’t care about spelling. I fixed a word in every single one of these.

• LAW AND ORDER SEASON 20: must be comfortable portraying a lesbian.

• MERCY: Featured Dying AIDS Patient Extra Female / 50 to 65 / AfricanAm

why does the aids patient have to be black? Huh!? Ok, enough of that.

• WHEN IN ROME: GOOFY FACE HISPANIC MALE

Ouch. Who watches “When in Rome” anyway. I’ve barely heard of that.

——–

New Additions – hot from my inbox – 9/9/09

I found this article in the Financial Times, which is a British daily, their Wall Street Journal equivalent.  It’s an article about a new and horrifying phenomenon that’s infecting high-level Cricket matches across the island nation. I’ve copied the text for you, although I’m not sure that’s actually allowed or not, but I think it’s been cited properly. Here the link to the original article. I find it hilarious on so many levels – the funny words I don’t understand, the complete shock and incomprehension from the author that this could happen in a sporting event, the fear and anger,  just the basic and fundamental differences between Americans and Brits. Give it a read.

It’s Not Cricket

Published: August 6 2009 19:05 – Financial Times

The cricket authorities in England are awaiting the opening of Friday’s Test match with Australia with a mixture of anticipation and dread. Anticipation because the cricket this summer has been superb – and another England victory would clinch a rare triumph in an Ashes series against Australia. Dread because the English supporters have taken to ill-mannered booing of the Australian players, and this match will take place at Headingley, where the crowd is notoriously drunk and rowdy.

Cricket is a game that has always prided itself on its tradition of sportsmanship, captured in the very phrase – “It’s not cricket.” The chairman of the English cricket board has appealed to the crowd not to barrack Ricky Ponting, the Australian captain, when he walks to the wicket. But the chairman may be disappointed.

Now comes an unexpected twist to the story. Leading members of the Australian team have said that they do not mind the barracking from the crowd – some even claim to find it inspirational. Shane Watson, Australia’s opening batsman, has said that “It’s a great part of being here in England.”

Being insulted by a drunk Yorkshireman in a polyester replica shirt is not normally counted as one of the highlights of a visit to England. But if the Australian team do no object to the abuse, do the rest of us have any right to complain?

Actually – yes, we do. It can be a real pain to sit anywhere near the “Barmy Army”, the rabid England supporters who do most of the chanting. At their worst, they are drunk, foul-mouthed, mindlessly partisan and curiously uninterested in the cricket. If they are allowed to set the tone at matches, supporters who prefer to watch in a more civilised atmosphere will simply stop going.

To be fair, on good days the Barmy Army can be funny. When Mark Waugh, an Australian player, was caught up in a betting scandal a few years ago, they came up with the song: “Mark Waugh is an Aussie/He wears the baggy cap/But when he saw the bookie’s cash/He said I’m having that.” This is Wildean wit compared with the one-word chant of “Ingerlund” favoured by football supporters.

The trouble is that too many England cricket fans crossed the line between “banter” and boorishness a long time ago. Chanting and booing the opposition have their place – at football matches. But if Test match cricket abandons its own tradition of sportsmanship, it will lose a large part of its charm along the way.

Copyright The Financial Times Limited 2009

Currently there are five network channels: Central Broadcasting Service, National Broadcasting Company, American Broadcasting Company, Fox Broadcasting Company and CW Television Network.

Something I looked up today and found tickled my mind a bit was that of these five networks only four of them have ever had a top Neilsen rated show for a year and FOX only within the past four years.

That show is of course American Idol, but before Idol FOX never had the top rated show. For the first twenty years of the Neilsen ratings only CBS and NBC had a top rated TV show, but ABC’s first was in 1971 with Marcus Welby, M.D., which I have never heard of, but I assume is about a doctor named Marcus.

CBS dominated the early 70s and the early 80s, but The Cosby Show on NBC held the mid-late 80s and then in the 90s and 00s CBS, NBC and ABC split it up all over the place with Seinfeld, ER, Roseanne, CSI, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?, Home Improvement, 60 Minutes, Cheers and Friends each taking it occasionally.

What kind of surprises me is that Married With Children was never the top rated show. FOX was a young network so I understand why not, but if American Idol is appealing to a low demographic then Married With Children and a few other early FOX shows were scraping the bottom of the barrel. And American Idol is still on top even though there are 800 copycat shows all over the world these days. I didn’t know Simon Cowell was that big of an asshole.

The movie trailer for the Coen Brother’s newest movie, A Serious Man, has just been released. Take a look:

The movie looks really good, but that trailer is incredible, isn’t it? I’m not sure if I’ve seen a more artful trailer ever. That incessant beat from the head hitting the wall and the accumulating noises from other parts is so crafty and well done. It’s so much more effective than any voice over could be. Did the Coen Brothers edit this trailer? Probably not, but to whoever did, I see a Golden Trailer Award in your future (that’s right, there is an award for movie trailers).

Watching it made me think of this blog post I wrote for a different blog about The Planet of the Apes and its trailer. I’ve pasted the post, along with the trailer, below.

- – - – - – - – - – - – - –

So, I just watched the original Planet of the Apes today. I was really just looking for something to watch while I ate lunch, but I got completely sucked in. And being unemployed, I got the time. I watched it all the way through, and I’ve got to say, the movie was fucking good. Not just fun to watch, but legitimately good.

I think it’s interesting that we all know the plot, we all know the quotes. It’s one of those movies that’s been inaugurated into our pop-culture, so much so that it feels like we’ve all seen it, without actually seeing it. When it’s referenced, we all get it, and can laugh at jokes about it, and make our own jokes without ever having to actually see it (this idea can also relate to the DVD collection, or the DVR, where just owning a copy of a movie gives us a level of satisfaction nearly equal to that of actually seeing the movie, but that’s a different topic for another time).

Back to movie. It’s great. The first quarter is masterfully suspenseful, packed with incredible landscape shots and great cinematography and music. Then come the apes, which are surprisingly not too dated. Then we get to an examination of ethics and humanity, then a sweet reveal, which we all know, but still gives you the chills, because Charlton Heston really was a sick actor. The movie also made me further realize how much the Mark Walburg one sucked.

How great is that trailer? Sure there’s some cheesy voice over, but you get to hear the man himself, Charlton Heston, explain the film. And how about that “This is a madhouse!” part? There’s a well made movie trailer.